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Square Roots - THE Classic RPG Podcast

Square Roots is like a book club, but for classic RPGs! Each episode John, Matthew, Jim and Vanessa play through another chunk of one of your favorite RPGs, from Final Fantasy through Chrono Trigger. Are they experts? No. Are they qualified? Absolutely not. Are they good at RPGs? Probably not. But they're the fun kind of dumb, and that's what counts.
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Now displaying: February, 2018

THE Classic RPG Podcast, w/Jim Banks, John Brandon, Matthew Van Zandt & Vanessa

Feb 26, 2018

Phantasy Star IV - Part 2

Sega's manga-inspired sci-fi epic takes a few, uh, predictable twists and turns as we explore a downed Phantasy Star III colony ship, explore Zio's Fort, and head into a tourist trap town. Topics covered this week include: we lose our Edible Arrangements sponsorship; Matthew ear-shames Rika; Vanessa discovers the secret of instant teleportation; our protagonist dilemma is sorted out;  we balance out Labia’s Tower jokes with sandworm foreskin jokes; the RPG need for brothels; Chaz brainstorms badly; we question the medical skills of Hahn and Sara; Vanessa has outdoor cat adventures; AND SO MUCH MORE!

Level Up: 05:15
Quest Log: 17:15
Squarely Against: 01:18:14
Matthew's Political Theories: 01:25:53

This week: We secure the Psycho Wand and head to Nurvus.
Next week: We meet Lutz and head to the penguin-filled town of Jut!

Our theme song for this series is by Sharp Rain Music, check out their Youtube for tons of awesome video game covers: https://www.youtube.com/user/rainheart666787

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 19, 2018

Phantasy Star IV - Part 1

We begin the epic space journey with Alys and Chaz in the town of learning, but something doesn't seem right. Why is the headmaster so evasive? What's up with those monsters in the basement? Is Jim the Hahn of the podcast? Why did we start with Phantasy Star IV? Does the game explain anything about any of its systems? Why is Vanessa so interested in Zio? How many fake languages is Matt going to have to learn? Does John want to make kissing with Professor Bearsley?

We answer all these questions and more in this deep dive into one of Sega's finest RPGs.

Level Up: 02:45
John Explains Phantasys Star I Through III: 09:45
Quest Log: 13:55
Jim's Rate-A-Babe: 01:07:29
Squarely Against: 01:10:25

This week: We venture deep into Birth Valley, and Rika emerges from its depths.
Next week: We secure the Psycho Wand and head to Nurvus.

Our theme song for this series is by Sharp Rain Music, check out their Youtube for tons of awesome video game covers: https://www.youtube.com/user/rainheart666787

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 17, 2018

Julian Titus from Nerds Without Pants joins Jim and John as they decide if the Miracle of Sound Commander Shepherd song deserves a Renegade or Paragon interrupt! This episode contains a careful review of the imagery used by Miracle of Sound, as well as a mailbag full of questions about Krogan genitals, Crossing Jordan, Asari babies, and Normandy crew slash fiction. Plus basic misunderstandings of microfilm!

Level Up: 03:40

Commander Shepherd Review: 13:40

Mailbag: 38:10

Please find Miracle of Sound's Commander Shepherd song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HiRDJLcYua0

Our theme song for this series is by Sophie Marlon, check out her violin covers of tons of game themes on YouTube at Sophie Marlon: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCET7Q5ZMfzqlgVf17AB-6DQ

BANDCAMP: https://sophiemarlon.bandcamp.com/

INSTAGRAM: @sophiemarlonansems

https://www.instagram.com/sophiemarlonansems/

TWITTER: @SophieMarlon https://twitter.com/SophieMarlon

FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/sophiemarlonansems

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 12, 2018

Mass Effect - Part 6 

Stay tuned through the end of the podcast for incredible dramatic readings of Matt’s notes! We finish off BioWare’s first venture into their epic science fantasy universe and decide whether or not we’re Squarely Against or Roundly For Shepherd and their adventures. Also? Vanessa and Matthew turn out to be twinsies; Matt is obsessed with a geth ship with a face; Vanessa’s Rate-A-Hunk goes macro; and SO MUCH MORE!

Level Up: 02:56

The Codex: 16:23

Vanessa’s Rate-A-Hunk: 57:10

Squarely Against: 01:03:03

Dramatic Readings of Matt’s Notes: 01:14:36

This Week:We finish Mass Effect 1!
Next Week: We start Phantasy Star IV and play through until leaving the BioPlant with Rika!

Our theme song for this series is by Sophie Marlon, check out her violin covers of tons of game themes on YouTube at Sophie Marlon: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCET7Q5ZMfzqlgVf17AB-6DQ

BANDCAMP: https://sophiemarlon.bandcamp.com/

INSTAGRAM: @sophiemarlonansems

https://www.instagram.com/sophiemarlonansems/

TWITTER: @SophieMarlon https://twitter.com/SophieMarlon

FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/sophiemarlonansems

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 5, 2018

Mass Effect 1 - Part 5

Next game is announced!

WARNING: JOHN MAKES THE VERY WORST JOKE EVER IN THIS EPISODE. Okay, now that we’re past that, Shepherd and their crew head to Ilos to catch up with Saren! Also covered in this episode: meeting Lord Darius; Vanessa’s Rate-A-Hunk; steamy Mass Effect love scenes; punching Ambassador Udina; the sexiest exposition-spouting VI; the terrible Pinnacle Station DLC and SO MUCH MORE.

This Week:We get in trouble for the nuking and then break some rules, punch some ambassadors, go to Ilos and drive our space truck through a portal.
Next Week: We finish Mass Effect 1!

Our theme song for this series is by Sophie Marlon, check out her violin covers of tons of game themes on YouTube at Sophie Marlon: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCET7Q5ZMfzqlgVf17AB-6DQ

BANDCAMP: https://sophiemarlon.bandcamp.com/

INSTAGRAM: @sophiemarlonansems

https://www.instagram.com/sophiemarlonansems/

TWITTER: @SophieMarlon https://twitter.com/SophieMarlon

FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/sophiemarlonansems

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

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