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Square Roots - THE Classic RPG Podcast

Square Roots is like a book club, but for classic RPGs! Each episode John, Matthew, Jim and Vanessa play through another chunk of one of your favorite RPGs, from Final Fantasy through Chrono Trigger. Are they experts? No. Are they qualified? Absolutely not. Are they good at RPGs? Probably not. But they're the fun kind of dumb, and that's what counts.
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Now displaying: 2021

THE Classic RPG Podcast, w/Jim Banks, John Brandon, Matthew Van Zandt & Vanessa

Feb 22, 2021

Have the tables turned on Final Fantasy 8? Is everyone loving it all of a sudden? What the hell? One word: TRAINS. On this episode of Square Roots: we visit the hot dog room, Vanessa wants feathery soft chocobo cuddles and fluffly flappy moogle cuddles, Laguna Loire is the first real protagonist of the game, Johnny breaks the game, a three-person locker is ordered, and Jim body shames Muncher.


This Week: We get to Galbadia Garden!
Next Week: We finish Disc 1!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast
Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 15, 2021

Oh boy. The JRPG you either love, hate, or have another opinion on - Square's Final Fantasy VIII. Topics covered today: L'il Baby I Don't know; this game is about reading in a serious way; identifying a real Lisa Kudrow; thicc, thicc Quistis; cargo jorts; sometimes Squall has a 4K face; and Vanessa's greatest mashup ever: Truly, Madly, Crazy.


This Week: We save Rinoa (??) after she meets the best looking guy at the dance!
Next Week: We get to Galbadia Garden!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast

Contact Square Roots!

Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 8, 2021

Mass Effect 2 COMPLETE. How many hosts crossed the finish line? Did everyone side with the Alliance or The Illustrated Man? Why were the Reapers building a Baby Terminator? What's up with all the useful people being loaded onto the Magic School Bus? Did Johnny get to romance Morinth? Who lived and who died on the suicide mission? So many questions!


This Week: We finish Mass Effect 2!
Next Week: We save Rinoa after she meets the best looking guy at the dance!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast

Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:
Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987
Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ
And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8

Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Feb 1, 2021

You'll be glad you came to listen to this episode of our Mass Effect 2 playthrough, because it's got it all: Vanessa questioning whether Johnny knows what a nipple is, Luke's classic line "No you weren't, Obi-Wan!", classic dumb robot logic, a doctor definitely not being controlled by this lovely, beautiful artifact, and Vanessa reveals that Batarians are technically people, but, you know. Also, don't forget: pew pew pew, launch launch launch, float float float, it's Mass Effect.


This Week: We play the DLC!
Next Week: We finish Mass Effect 2!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast

Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:

Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987

Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ

And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8

Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Jan 25, 2021

On this week's episode of Square Roots, we clear up all the Loyalty Missions in Mass Effect 2, as well as so many other shocking revelations including: Elcor stepmom fan fiction, Wesident Evil 8 Vampire Lady, Morinth and her love for Matchbox 20, Johnny's apparent love for Boondock Saints and Garrus trying to frame Shepherd for his crimes.


This Week: We finish recruiting Space Friends!
Next Week: We do all the Loyalty Missions!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast

Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:
Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987
Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ
And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8

Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Jan 18, 2021

Finally, we get the whole team together in this action-packed chunker of Mass Effect! This week: tum-tums are punched and shot, we lean into our kids show host natures, Vanessa wants to Shape of Water Thane, people get sucked down the Illusive Man Space YouTube hole, Biotic Space God Niftu Cal, recruiting Timothy Olyphant and Snooki to help finish the fight, IRL Samara, Tattooed Teenage Fighters from Beverly Hills, ASMR Harbinger, and everyone's favorite Vader lines.
This Week: We finish recruiting Space Friends!
Next Week: We do all the Loyalty Missions!
Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast
Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:
Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987
Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ
And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8
Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Jan 11, 2021

We're now getting deep into Mass Effect 2! On this episode we recruit the prisoner, meet up with Doctor Okurrrrrrrr, and save the Horizon Zero Dawn colony. Also this week: we compare the abilities of Cutscene Jack versus Game Jack, question just what symbols are on the side of the new Cerebus Normandy, Vanessa tries her hand at slash fiction, and so much more!


This Week: We rescue the Horizon colony!
Next Week: We finish recruiting Space Friends!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast

Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:

Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987

Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ

And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8

Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Jan 4, 2021

On your favorite podcast on the citadel this season: we discuss Mass Effect 2! So much to go through that this chunker hits almost three hours. Sorry. Topics discussed include: Miranda's game cover blowout; potential colony names including MILF Town and Slut Zone (again); the Helena Blake Sale; Garrus's erotic leg spread and of course Jim's big teeth fetish.


This Week: We recruit Archangel!
Next Week: We will play through the dossiers of the convict, warlord and Horizon Colony! Plus Citadel quests.


Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast


Thanks to Ro Panuganti and Lord Bif for letting us use their cover of Mass Effect 2's Suicide Mission:

Check out Ro Panuganti's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/Swiggles1987


Check out Lord Bif's YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAe-WMrDelXvw9ik2MpwBHQ


And the video for this track is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJzkQQFbPN8


Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/


Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

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