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Square Roots - THE Classic RPG Podcast

Square Roots is like a book club, but for classic RPGs! Each episode John, Matthew, Jim and Vanessa play through another chunk of one of your favorite RPGs, from Final Fantasy through Chrono Trigger. Are they experts? No. Are they qualified? Absolutely not. Are they good at RPGs? Probably not. But they're the fun kind of dumb, and that's what counts.
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Now displaying: December, 2021

THE Classic RPG Podcast, w/Jim Banks, John Brandon, Matthew Van Zandt & Vanessa

Dec 29, 2021

NOW WITH 90% LESS CHIPMUNK VOICES!

You probably saw this one coming: it's a two hander! Johnny and Matthew dig through the second disc of Metal Gear Solid, with Johnny finding it brisk and fun and poor Matthew feeling like it takes forever. But you've got some iconic boss fights, weird jokes, and completely reconstructed cut scenes between the original PlayStation version and the GameCube Twin Snakes. Also this episode:

- Muscle Milkers
- Metal Gear as Metroidvania
- Matthew Can't Handle The Master Miller Twist
- Gemome Soldiers
- Johnny Can't Stop Saying Les Enfants Terribles
- Two Games In A Row With A Shirtless Wrestling Match
- So Many Fake Outs
- This Game Is Twins and Liquid Is the Danny DeVito

This Week: We finish Metal Gear Solid!
Next Week: We recruit all five extra party members in Dragon Age II!


Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast
Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven
Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Dec 20, 2021

Sure, it's not an RPG, but Konami's Metal Gear Solid IS a classic. And on this special holiday season of Square Roots we venture with Snake to Alaska, pretty close to where Santa lives. We try to make sense of the metal gear lore, talk about neuropeptides like we know what they mean, and Vanessa writes in an analysis of Meryl's big acting scene.
Also this week:
- Trashing the PS Classic
- Twin Snakes Versus The Original
- Has Kojima Ever Talked To A Woman?
- Those Legs Are Connected To A Butt
- "Nanomachines"
- Boomer Tigersoft

This Week: We finish Disc 1!
Next Week: We finish Metal Gear Solid!


Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast
Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven
Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Dec 13, 2021

For some reason Tales of Vesperia decides to squeeze about twenty hours of content into five hours of game, meaning there's a lot of reveals, narrative shifts, insane twists, and the most homoerotic wrestling match ever. But will Yuri and pals save the world? Is there really a final Necron? Who is the actual Sephiroth of the game?
Also this week:
- Can you vore a ghost?
- Noted floppy haired boy Brian Doyle Murray
- The The Doctor Is A Woman Twist
- Yuri and Flynn Play Wrestle
- The Insane Patty Reveal
- Poople
- The Last Real Boss Fight of the Game

This Week: We finish the game!
Next Week: We blow up the Hind D in Metal Gear Solid!


Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast


Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Dec 6, 2021

Oops! It’s all Sephiroths when we try to figure out just who will be the big bad of this chunker. Will it be the white haired Sephiroth with the magical sword? Or the other white haired Sephiroth with a magical sword? Or will it be that one guy who looks like Ginger Spice? There’s some apocalyptic action as we dive through this penultimate chunker!
Also this week:

  • Johnny & Vanessa Breakout Episode: Oops All Bad Games
  • Aloysius, Frank Miller, and Dinosaur
  • Entelexeia Cellphone
  • Julia Louise-Dryfus’s Apartment in Troll
  • LeTrack, Campbell Soup and Sparnod
  • The Gender Buffet

This Week: We finish Zaude!
Next Week: We finish the game!


Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast
Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven
Contact Square Roots!
Twitter: @squarerootspod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/
Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

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